Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Getting Organized For an Amazing Anniversary

Remember the days when every little thing your spouse did was adorable and romantic? Remember how you called all of your friends to gush about him and how cute he looked or how thoughtful he seemed? Flash forward to the present day, when you're more likely to focus on what she hasn't done for you lately. Sure, you're still calling your friends about her, but what you're saying now bears little resemblance to the early days. What once began as just the two of you is now a house, two cars, a dog, two kids, and countless bills to pay and chores to do. It's hard to keep everything running smoothly, but it's relatively easy to lose sight of why you chose that person in the first place. That's why anniversaries are so important. They are an annual reminder to slow down, enjoy each other, and celebrate everything you've done and where you're going.

Sarah on "celebrating no matter what"

"I'll admit that I've fallen into that common trap of blowing off my anniversary if it's not a particularly big one. Fourth anniversary? Nobody really makes a big deal about that one, right? It's easy to forget about it when it's not a big one, but the truth is that it takes so little time to plan something nice for your spouse and it makes him/her feel so loved and special. It doesn't have to be big, but cooking a special meal or dragging out the wedding video can be a way to celebrate your life together."

Alicia on "having a reason to celebrate"

"I love celebrating. I'm the type that would even throw an Arbor Day party if I thought people might come, so when it's my anniversary, I go all out. I've been known to celebrate an entire birthday week, so parties and celebrations are definitely my thing. Luckily, my husband loves celebrations too, and he's just as willing to plan something special. Some years, we even turn it into a fun competition to see who can outromance and outplan the other."

Here are a three other ways you can celebrate your marriage:

1. Dig out the Photos.

You probably spent a pretty penny on the photography at your wedding, so break out the album and enjoy looking through it together. A great way to celebrate each new anniversary is by making a new album each year that chronicles what you've done together and how you've grown. As the years, and the albums, add up, it is a nice reminder of all of the things you've accomplished together. It doesn't have to be a huge one, and if all of your photos are digital, you can create a photo book in a matter of minutes.

2. Put pen to paper.

You don't need to be Shakespeare to write a love letter. It's such a simple thing, but it can mean so much. It costs nothing but your time and energy and is such a special way to share the things you love about your spouse. One idea is to share a quality or trait that you love about that person for every year you've been married.

3. Don't Forget Friends and Family.

They were there for your engagement and your wedding, so why not involve your closest friends and family in your anniversary celebrations? You don't need to be renewing your vows with an Elvis impersonator to invite them. It can be a simple backyard BBQ or night out on the town, but it's a meaningful way to involve all of those closest to you.

Simple Ways to Surprise Your Partner on Your Anniversary

Celebrating your anniversary is one of the best moments that you and your partner can enjoy for one whole day. This event should be celebrated with no disturbances in terms of work or other activities and must only focus on joyfully spending time together and make it an unforgettable moment that both of you will remember and treasure forever.

To make this day more special, you have do something to surprise your partner and make her extremely happy. There are a lot ways for you to do that, but what is really important is your effort of whole-heartedly making the love of your life feels your genuine affection. Here are some simple ways that you can follow:

1. You can prepare a 24-hour anniversary activity list. With this kind of surprise, you will start celebrating your anniversary at the very moment the clock reaches 12 midnight of your awaited date.

To surprise your partner, you can start by giving a warm hug while she is asleep and whisper your greetings together with a sincere "I LOVE YOU". With this simply way, your partner will surely love such romantic surprise because it is unexpected to start your celebration at the very second the time reaches your anniversary's date.

Then when morning comes, you can already show your sweetheart the different events that you have planned to make your whole day special. And your celebration will end until the clock reaches midnight again.

2· You can be your partner's romantic slave for a day. With this kind of surprise, you have to do everything for your partner in a romantic way. Nothing can compare serving the love of your life with all of your efforts to express how much you appreciate and love her. In return, your partner will show you her extreme happiness and love for you.

3· You can give her a passionate kiss, a sincere greeting, and a surprise anniversary card. This is known as the simplest ways to surprise you partner and the most effective methods of expressing all your feelings for her.

4· You can prepare a gift, which your partner would never expect and that perfect gift would be a set of elegant jewelleries. This will surely be an excellent way to surprise your partner since such gift is just too expensive for you to buy. So this simply means that you have to save a portion of your monthly allowance until that special will come.

As you can see, these are just some simple ideas that you can try but you are assured that these are 100% effective ways to surprise your partner on your anniversary.

Write a Love Letter

Love letters are a powerful way to heat up the romance in your relationship whether it's on your anniversary or any time of the year. But when you think of a love letter what comes to mind? Is it a piece of parchment paper full of eloquent wording, written in calligraphy using a quill pen? Maybe you think of an envelope sealed with an embossment in wax?

This is the traditional (and very good) way to go about writing a love letter and many amorous people have used this method to express their love to their partner. There are many blog posts and articles on how to write that kind of love letter and I won't reinvent the wheel here.

Those "old school" love letters have their place... a wonderful place... in relationships. I only have one problem with them: they are not "real." They are not "down to earth." And, unless you speak Shakespearean English on a daily basis, it isn't even the most effective means to express how you feel. Its novelty is the primary pay off. But there are many ways to remain novel, stay current and still get your point across that doesn't require an artist's eye for calligraphy, a college major in English or a deeply introspective psyche. In fact, all you really need to know to write an effective love letter is how your partner makes you feel and the things about that person that you appreciate.

Let's get started:

1. Brainstorm. What is it about your beau or belle that you love? Is it her smile? Her laugh? Is it the way he sings in the shower? Is he considerate of your sexual needs? What things about your partner's character do you admire? Do you find her confidence or his sensitivity sexy? Only you know these things. So take 15 minutes and make a list of everything that you can think of. Make sure when you do this that you have no other distractions around you. Different people concentrate in different ways: some prefer absolute silence while others require some kind of background noise. Whatever you need to focus for fifteen minutes, do it!

2. Find the "why". Think of why you love those particular things about your sweetie. Write the reason next to the thing that you love. It doesn't matter whether the reason is something trivial or goes to the very core of you. What you are looking for is the connection between what you feel and why.

3. Prioritize your list. This step is optional, but can afford you some cool benefits down the road (I'll get to this in a minute). Which things about your partner have a profound impact on you? Which ones are more or less "icing on the cake"? Which ones meet a core need in you?

It can be important to think of these things for a couple of different reasons. First, if you have a huge list (and I'm sure you do!) it allows you to focus on the things about your partner that really, truly means a lot to you. If you're time constrained or writing-impaired, this can allow you to write a short letter that still delivers a high emotional impact. Secondly, you can use the items that didn't make your "short list" for other romantic anniversary ideas later on. More on that in a minute!

4. Write the letter. Now for the fun part! Before we start, take a deep breath and keep a couple of things in mind:

First, you don't have to be a Ralph Waldo Emerson or Emily Dickenson to convey love effectively. Your letter doesn't have to be wordy or long. Just keep it simple and honest. Don't try to be an award-winning laureate (unless you are one, of course). Your partner loves you for who you are, not for being someone else. So just be you.

Second, don't worry about what paper you're writing on or what ink you're using or even how neat your handwriting is (as long as it's readable). Just write what you feel. The presentation DOES matter, but not nearly as much as what you're presenting. So grab a blank notebook sheet or a piece of printer paper and get to writing!

Third, use your list to write your letter. Tell your partner exactly what you love about them and WHY. The "why" is perhaps the most important part of this process:

"I love it when you're concentrating on something and you think no one is watching. You stick your tongue out ever so slightly. It's endearing. There's something so innocent and sweet in that little gesture and every time I see it I want to kiss you."

vs.

"I love it when you're concentrating on something and you think no one is watching. You stick your tongue out ever so slightly."

See the difference? Your partner will appreciate the first. You'll probably lose some ground for the second one.

Third, and last pointer. Don't over-edit your feelings. This isn't a college essay. It's a reminder to your partner of why you fell in love with him and why you're still in love with her now. That's it. That's all that's important for your partner to know. Don't worry about your wording too much. When you're done writing, set your letter aside for an hour or two and then come back to it. Read it to yourself. If it makes sense to you and seems to flow well then leave it alone! If there are changes you'd like to make then make them. But when you're done editing, let it go! It is perfect as it is. Edit it too much and you risk losing the "you" in your love letter.

Now date your letter at the top, fold it and put it in an envelope with your partner's name on it. Think of someplace creative to leave it. If you leave for work before your partner does, leave it on the bathroom counter or on the driver's seat in his vehicle. If you leave after she does, then fold the envelope in half and put it in the pants pocket of her work clothes or business suit that she'll wear the next day. Put it in her purse. Try to think of a place to leave it where you know he'll find it, but that there is zero chance of someone else finding it. You don't want the mail person or delivery guy reading your innermost thoughts and feelings!

And congratulations! You're done! One last minute-tip, though. Remember the things that you love about your partner that didn't make the "short list"? Here's an idea on how to use them:

Find creative ways to tell your partner those things too!

Write them down on sticky notes and post them in random places throughout the house. Or send a tweet a day to her via Twitter. Buy a magnetic alphabet and spell one out for him on your refrigerator every morning. There are tons of ways to tell your partner what you love about him every day.

So get to it. I wish you great love in your relationship and much happiness in your life!

The Importance of Anniversaries

Anniversaries are an important opportunity to stop and take time to reflect on the significance of a particular person, day or time in our life. There can be public anniversaries, times of national celebration and euphoria like a royal golden wedding anniversary, where there is much coverage of all that has happened during the intervening years since the original event, prompting a time of national nostalgia. Or there can be anniversaries commemorating a special national triumph, like a major sporting achievement. And these times can provide important opportunities to pull together as a nation and reinforce a country or community's united sense of pride and loyalty.

There can also be anniversaries that provide a time of national mourning, a time to respect and commemorate the people who have died on our behalf, the valour of people who experienced great hardship or difficulties for an important belief, right or freedom. The shared emotion of these times is also a time for individuals to recall their own experience of loss. Personal memories and associations are always a factor in the midst of a national emotion. We may have lost family members or loved ones, or we may empathise and have other experiences of loss that allow us to share and connect with the feelings of deep emotion at these times.

Personal anniversaries are often a time of joy and celebration. Birthdays and wedding anniversaries can be times when the whole family makes the effort to reunite and celebrate whilst also catching up on news and closeness that may have been neglected during the intervening time. They can also be tinged with sadness and nostalgia, remembering those people who are no longer around.

Some families maintain the tradition of celebrating a mother's birthday long after she has died. They know how much she enjoyed seeing the whole family together and continuing the tradition is an important way to honour her life and her memory. These times provide an opportunity for families to reconnect, to take time to be with each other and reinforce the family bond once more.

Remembering the significance of an anniversary is important too. A couple may buy each other gifts and cards, go away for a weekend together on their wedding anniversary, but it is also important to take time out to remember their vows and commitment to each other. It can provide an important time to reflect on their life together and the various experiences, challenges and successes that they have been through. These times provide an opportunity to stop and reflect on the importance of their relationship, how much it means to them and to value what they have. It provides an interlude to commit to appreciating it again fully.

Celebrating the life of a loved one no longer with us can be a very special way to remember an anniversary. Some families may choose to share a meal, a toast, time together. National mourning for a public figure can also provide an opportunity for people to grieve for their personal loss, as they share in the emotion of other people. Rituals can provide comfort and a sense of familiarity, of coming back to ones roots at a designated time. They can provide reassurance and grounding.

There can also be other types of anniversaries. Some people recall the time when they made an important decision, to end a marriage, leave their job, start their own business, change their image. Remembering these dates can be a poignant occasion. Often even if these choices turn out to be less than perfect or smooth to achieve, the date of a major change of direction or the start of an eventful new beginning can be remembered with affection and celebrated. We can take the time on these days to value what we have done, appreciate how courageous we have been and give ourselves credit for our achievements.

The Perfect Wedding Gifts For Parents

If you want to show that you appreciate your parents help during your wedding, then why not give them gifts? There's no perfect timing for giving gifts to your parents, you can give it to them before or after the wedding. Do not miss the chance to thank your and your partner's parents for taking good care of both of you. Maybe you have difficulties in finding the right gifts for your parents, why not try the following choices?

If you want your parents to fully appreciate the gifts, then better give them those items which are special and with sentimental value. You have to consider everyone in buying gifts even new members. You can also consider other factors like the background and history of your family. You do not want to settle for simple gifts right, then you should use your imagination in presenting the gifts.

One of the best gifts that you can give your parents is a photo album. You can always buy creative photo albums at the nearest mall. If you cannot decide what to place in the album, then maybe you can have your wedding photos. Do not wait for your parents to place the photos in the album, do it yourself as soon as possible.

You can also give jewelries as gifts for your parents. If you want you can purchase jewelry that your parents can use at your wedding. You can be creative in giving jewelry as gifts by having it engraved or personalized.

In addition, it is really wise to give gifts that can be very useful for your parents. If the gift is useful, then your parents will definitely enjoy and treasure the gift. Here are some of the choices which will be fully appreciated by your father and mother, a tea set, a bathrobe, a lighter, a flask, a shaver, and other similar items.

You can actually see some of the best ideas for gift on the wedding day itself. The gifts may be cheap. One of which is to buy exquisite flowers and have it arranged then offer it to your parents. Or if you want to have a unique way of giving the surprise then choose the perfect time like when your parents start walking down the aisle.

The gifts for your folks must be simple and affordable. Just keep your gifts simple by personalizing them. Look online for brilliant ideas on the gifts. You may also need to buy gifts for your groomsmen, bridesmaid, ring bearer, and flower girl.

The Anniversary Ladder

There are a lot of great ideas on how to make anniversaries romantic floating around out there. Today I want to draw some attention to a fun concept I call the "anniversary ladder." It's not a new concept, but it is extremely romantic and often under-utilized! The basic premise works like this:

For every year that you have been together, a day is added before your anniversary date that you do something special for your significant other. This can be a gift, a card, dinner...anything that is romantic and shows your partner that they are special to you.

For example, let's assume that you have been together for four years and your anniversary falls on October 29th. Four years together = four days of celebration, so the first day of celebration will fall on October 26th. On this day you could give a card, either store-bought or hand-made, with a clever quip or genuine message about how much your partner means to you. On the 27th, four hydrangeas (the 4th anniversary flower) or roses accompanied with another note. On the 28th, you could simply leave a hand-written note under your sweetie's driver-side windshield wiper in the morning that says how much you are looking forward to celebrating four years together. On the 29th, the actual day of your anniversary, do something creative! The symbolic gifts for the fourth year anniversary are linen or silk (traditional), appliances (modern...but be careful if you go this route!), and fruit or flowers (traditional - United Kingdom).

Whichever gift you choose, pick one with the end in mind. Give your partner something that will last a lifetime!

This concept is very neat for a few different reasons, but the one that I want to talk about is momentum. This method builds great momentum in the relationship! Every year your anniversary celebration is stretched out across multiple days, not just one (except your first anniversary, of course). It becomes a season in and of itself, not just a four or five-hour dating ritual that happens once a year. It builds genuine respect and conveys honor to both your partner and the relationship you share. And every year that season gets longer. You'll find that you both begin to anticipate it earlier. You spend more time thinking of new and creative ways to show your partner what they mean to you. It is a season of renewal. It forces you to think out of the box and give something that no amount of money can buy...the gift of you! Your creativity. Your generosity. Your romantic flair.

So go. Do something amazing this anniversary! Whether it be your first or fiftieth anniversary there is something new you can bring to the relationship this year. Good luck, and Happy Anniversary!

Monday, December 6, 2010

10 Ways To Keep Your Woman Happy

Know what it takes to keep your woman happy? If you want to save the relationship and keep the fires burning, learn these 10 ways to make your woman happy and keep her that way.

1. Be yourself at all times. Putting up a front may work at the start of the relationship when you are trying to make an impression but this may not be effective for the long term. Many men think and feel that they are not good enough to get the woman they desire; and this diminishes their self-confidence. But do you know that confidence is a sexy trait that is a natural come on? A confident man oozes with sex appeal and self-confidence is more potent than just good looks or a sexy body. Women feel safe and secure being with a man who is not afraid to show his true self to others. Being yourself and confidently showing it rids you of hang-ups and makes you act naturally.

2. The little things matter the most. Offer to take her to her dance classes or buy her a box of her favorite donuts. Or surprise her with a cup of her favorite cappuccino. Your woman will love these little things that you can do for her. It is not the grand gestures which make the most points with women; it is the little things you can do that ooze with thoughtfulness that will melt her heart.

3. Be more vocal in your appreciation of her. Taking her for granted is a no-no. Tell her how you value her. Women love to hear this and you can never say this too much.

4. Never, I mean never, look at other women when you are with your woman. Women are very sensitive about this. When she sees you looking at other women, feelings of inadequacy creep in and makes your woman feel bad. Remember women are more likely to be in a relationship with the long term in mind. And when she sees you ogling at other women, she will sense that you may not be into the relationship for the long term, making her give up on you.

5. Inject humor into the relationship. Make your woman laugh. A man with a sense of humor is more attractive than someone who is so serious all the time.

6. Discover common interests. When you and your woman do things together, you strengthen the bond between you. Take interest in what she is interested in. This is a very powerful way of showing her you really care and this will gain you a ton of points in her heart.

7. Don't get sloppy with your looks. Just because you have been with your woman for a while doesn't mean you should get lax with how you look. Shave on weekends and maintain that neat, clean look that attracted her to you in the first place. Keep up with the latest trends in fashion. Don't dress shabbily just because you've landed your woman.

8. Make an effort to know and get along with her family and friends. Be part of her life and take interest in her circle of friends. Women need her friends and family to validate her choice in a man so make extra effort to make an impression.

9. Be sensitive to your woman's feelings. Be considerate when she is feeling low or having one of her bad days. Sometimes it's all hormonal and women can't help it. And if she feels that you are with her 100% through the good and bad times, she will love you more for it.

10. Be open to trying out new things with your woman. Don't stagnate. If you do things the same way over and over again these become routine and boring. Being in the relationship for a while, you and your woman will have a tendency to just stay in your comfort zones. Take the initiative to discover and try out new things together and inject excitement back into the relationship.

These are simple, easy to do tips that you can do to save the relationship from trouble. Do not trap yourself into complacency. A relationship has to be nurtured for this to develop and flourish. Don't allow yourself to be ensnared in your own comfort zone. If you feel that your relationship is in a rut and are wondering how to make your woman happy, follow these tips and you will be on your way in your quest to save the relationship

Analyzing Your Relationships

If you want to tell a person who is not progressive in life, look at the amount of unnecessary baggage that they allow to linger around their lives. Whenever you are carrying around with you a lot of relationships that do not add value to your life and a lot of procedures that do not make your business any easier, know that you are not progressive.

Have you analyzed your wardrobe lately? You should always remove the clutter in your wardrobe in a regular basis. A good check on the clothes that are past their time are those that you have not worn in the recent six months. A nice way to rid of these would be to donate them.

Your business routine and your personal life will also depend on the same principles. You need to trim the bulk and have those things that can only catapult you to higher ground. It will make a difference in how well you achieve your goals. Applying some little logic, you will find that there is no benefit in carrying that burden.

You should take a breather soon and use it to analyze personal relationships and business relations. Crosscheck all the contacts you have at your disposal. Consider these questions:

Is there any thing to lose if you omitted X or Y from your daily routine? What contributions do they make to your daily routine and the future?

Do these people make you lag behind on an issue or two? Do you spend too much time trying to find a way around something and it is not working out?

A lot of the things that happen in the future greatly depend on the things that we do now and the decisions that we make.

If you think about how bright your future can be, you will not have trouble cutting off those extra pounds.

Get Your Ex Wife Back

How to Make Your Ex Wife to Love You Again

Ok, so you messed up with your ex wife but now want to get back with her and build a healthy long lasting marriage. You were probably too young and immature to make the relationship work before. But wait, Is it possible that after so much anger during and after your marriage that you would consider returning to that relationship? You may find yourself asking if it is possible that after such a long and excruciating pain of divorce, you can find happiness and make your ex wife to love you again. Well the answer is a very painful yes.

It is a truly traumatic experience when love dies in a marriage. The question of what went wrong? What could I have done differently? are common questions you will consider at some point in your quiet times. You will be surprised to know that like you many others still love their ex and will like to reconnect with them.

Do not beat yourself up wondering that had you been a better husband, things might have been significantly different. Well here is your chance to make your marriage work and make your ex wife to love you a second time around.

Reaching Out

The first step is to reach out to her and apologize for any wrong you have done, tell her you genuinely love her and you are willing to commit to the relationship and make it work this time. If your wife truly loved you but split up because of something you did to hurt her, tendency is that she still loves you and has that soft spot. Do not put any pressure on your wife, give her enough time and wait for her to return to you on her own terms.

Restore the trust and learn to communicate

No relationship gets anywhere without trust. In any relationship or marriage, trust is nearly as important as love. A woman leaves when she has lost all hope and trust. Whatever may have pulled you apart would have broken that trust she once had for you. So you need to restore the trust.

How do you restore a broken trust? It will definitely take time, but you have to do it through re-assuring her through what you say and showing it through your behavior. Be open and honest to her that she can actually see through you, make her aware of any decisions you are making and get her actively involved in everything you are planning to do. This is the true case of action speaks louder than words.

Touch on the past briefly, but Focus on love

Look back at what went wrong together with your ex, identify the root cause and commit to make changes. While it is important to touch on the sensitive topic on why there was a split, make it brief and focus on the new found love you now have for your wife.

Re-ignite passion

Re-ignite the passion in your relationship through intimacy. Intimacy is not just about sex, it is also about connecting emotionally. Have your together time, just the two of you, away from the kids, family and other baggages that sometime comes with marriage. Be affectionate with her, go out on a date, spend a weekend away from home. Remember you want your ex wife to love you again, so do all the initial ground work and with time she will learn to trust and start to love you again.

Pay attention to the things you have in common

Make it a point to talk and listen to what your ex wife has to say each and every day. Spend more time learning those things you share in common and focus on them.L earn how to have more fun together, when you do things together it shows you care enough to be with her.

Treat her with love and respect

Every woman wants to be treated like a princess. Send her flowers for no reason. Call her up and tell her how much you love her and can't wait to get back to her.

Most importantly take it slow and be determined to make it work. Your Ex wife will love you again when she sees you are making every effort to change. There are many ways to rebuild love and save your marriage if you know how, this mostly revolves around communication.

Saving a Broken Relationship

Relationships are never easy. When a relationship is not going so well, it can be difficult to find out exactly what is wrong and how to fix it. There are some things you can do to get it back on the right track. First you must determine if the relationship is worth it and, if so, how to save a broken relationship. There are times when some just aren't saving, but in most cases you can make it work. It just takes some effort on your part.

The first thing you must do when you want to know how to save a broken relationship is to keep the communication lines open. When you are constantly getting into a fight and walking away from each other, nothing is ever going to get resolved. Both partners will need to be able to talk calmly and rationally. By doing so, you can avoid saying something in the heat of the moment that you will regret later. Be patient and listen to what the other person is saying. Although it may be painful to hear, you can only fix what you know about. That is the first step to saving the relationship.

When doing so, you may need to agree to disagree in certain areas. There are just some things that you may never agree on, but you are sure to find some middle ground in other areas. Something drew you together in the first place and you can find that thing again. You are each individuals with your own dreams and desires, but in most cases some of these will intersect. That is where you need to restart and know how to save a broken relationship.

One thing that you must remember when trying to determine how to save a broken relationship is that you must have patience. Your relationship did not fall apart in one day and it isn't going to be mended that quickly either. Take things slowly and focus on the good parts. Try not to dwell on the past, but move forward as a team. You can get your relationship back on solid ground and it will be stronger as a result.

10 Principles For Success In Relationship

On the path to self mastery we must each address how to deal with relationships. The most common of course would be the relationships pertaining to love, courtship, commitment and marriage. Though different feelings are at play during each of these phases there are certain principles that are important during the interplay between all the personalities involved. These principles are in no way exclusive to amorous relationships, they can be applied to a variety of relationships.

These principles would encompass Trust, Honesty, Communications, Listening, Patience, Respect, Priorities, Commitment, Planning, Follow Through. These Principles are the foundation of any and all relationships.

Trust:

Whether you are dealing with a spouse, lover, friend, associate, work partner, family member or any other individual there must be a mutual trust in order for a relationship to be on solid footing. It is incumbent on you to instill trust and have trust in the other person or the relationship will eventually fall apart.

Honesty:

Any relationship that is not rooted in honesty will cause confusion and the personalities involved will soon assume that whatever is said may not be truthful, therefor the first principle of trust will never develop.

Communications:

One of the biggest problems with relationships is the lack of communications. It is perhaps the principle that is most neglected and the one that should be the anchor for a successful relationship. In some cases what is said can be destructive and other times what is not said leads to a breakdown that ends in a breakup. It is through communications that the principles of trust and honesty are established. Every effort should be made to communicate honestly without being obnoxious or destructive.

Listening:

In order to for a relationship to flourish those that are involved must develop the habit of listening. When you are predisposed to just thinking of yourself the other persons concerns are not addressed and important information might be ignored. Listening is an art.You will find that the more you listen to others and comment on their feelings the stronger the relationships grow.

Patience:

Relationships take time. They grow with time as those who enter into a relationship will slowly learn the depth of their feelings. In the process judgments can be made as to the worthiness of that relationship.

Respect:

Any relationship worth having must have a mutual respect. That respect must be inwardly as well as outwardly. When one person disrespects another in front of others (even jokingly) it is inappropriate and detrimental to that relationship.

Priorities:

If the individuals concerned have a different set of priorities then there will be a strain in that relationship. The importance of communicating and listening are the two principles which play a greater part of determining those priorities. Depending on how intense their priorities are will determine the success of that relationship.

Commitment:

A strong relationship must have mutual commitments. Whether it be as life partners or business partners there has to be a commitment on all sides. This commitment is made after the parameters of the relationship is established. Too often there is a lopsided commitment and problems arise from those disparities. Again it is important to communicate honestly and listen intently so there is no confusion as to the degree of commitment.

Planning:

Once things start falling in line and all parties communicate their needs, expectations and commitments then it would be wise to set up a plan to keep the relationship on track. When talking about planning it is necessary to put aside time. All relationships need defined periods of time for success. Marriage, sexual as well as platonic relationship, business affiliates and friendships need segments of time where there is interaction and communication.

Follow Through:

Once everything is communicated, committed to and agreed upon it is imperative that it be followed through. Too often relationships are destroyed because one of the parties does not fulfill their part of the relationship. Sometimes this is the result of outside influences, prior commitments, work obligations and things that crop up unexpectedly, however to develop good relations there must be some mechanism in place to deal with changes. This should be developed during the planning stage of the relationship.

Much of what I have written here is generic however the principles apply to any relationship involving love, lust, or social interaction with spouses, lovers, children, siblings, family, co-workers, friends, and supervisors. Following these core principles should help you to develop and maintain a good relationships or to discover that the relationship was not appropriate. I should also stress that one need not seek perfection in developing relationships since we are all human and have our own shortcomings. These principles are intended as guidelines and subject to individual perceptions of others.

The Days of the Gentleman Are Gone

Nowadays we call a woman lucky if her date opens the door and pulls out her chair before sitting at a table. A small gesture of this manner use to be the norm; now it's the exception. You shouldn't be surprise if your date has already ordered his drink by the time you sit. "I'm sorry, did you want a drink?" As men, we have lost our way because the 'bad boys' are being rewarded. Both genders laugh and act as if it is nothing, but this is why the gentleman, as you once knew him, is in danger of facing extinction!

In general, if a man wants to take a woman out to dinner, it is fair to say that he has to act like a gentleman. In many situations, this notion stands true; it is similar to if the sky is blue, then it's not raining; but we've been proven wrong, logic has failed us. It has been proven that if a man acts like a jack, then there is a greater chance that a woman will fall in love with him. Now, I understand that most females enjoy the companionship of a man with an edge, but why does having an edge mean that this man has to be a 'bad boy'? The concept of being a gentleman has been misunderstood to the point that some think that being a gentleman means that you are soft.

Who wants to be looked upon as being soft?

Ladies, the day of the gentleman is coming to an end! The gentleman use to be what everyone respected, but now some are claiming that his shell is not hard enough. They say this because he understands that bringing you flowers will make you happy, while understanding that these flowers shouldn't be used just to get back on your good side. They all say that he is not a real man because he allows you to see his manly feelings. Is that why he should be considered as being soft with no edge? Or is it because he allows you to release your anger on him while controlling his temper even though he knows that you are wrong? You see, the world has convinced most of us that a real man doesn't have to have character in order to have a good lady by his side, but can that really be true?

The 'bad boy' walks around with his hard shell and never lets you see his true self. His quick temper puts you at risk every time that he reacts without thinking because he lacks patience. He is afraid to tell you that inside he is as soft as jelly because you fell in love with his bad attitude; foolish of him, he now has to keep up with this show in order to keep you by his side. He'll tell you that he will do this and that just to put a smile on your face, but he will disappoint you every time because his word has no value. The 'bad boy' talks about being a real man, but he has forgotten what a real man is composed of. So is the gentleman soft or is it the 'bad boy'?

The gentleman is vanishing, while the 'bad boy' is being recognized as a true man. Eventually, females will make the choice, and that choice will decide if the gentleman will live on. It would be a disappointment if the 'bad boy', an immature version of a gentleman, becomes the new face of a real man! Ladies, please keep in mind when you make your decision that 'bad boys' are men who need to be fixed, while gentlemen are already prepared to love and be loved!

Sunday, December 5, 2010

How to Flirt With Him

Flirting can be fun, cheeky, innocent, or completely gratuitous! These flirting tips for girls will show you how to invite interaction, break the ice and seal the deal.

Eye Contact Flirting

Eye contact is one of the quickest and easiest ways to start a flirting flutter. Especially when you use the tried and tested flirting never fail, the 'Glance and Look Down'. This combination look sends a very clear message of; I'm interested, come hither and fast! Look for a guy you fancy scanning the room waiting to see something he likes, make eye contact then hold his gaze with a mischievous smile. Look down but not away, then glance up again clearly showing your intention. It won't be long before you reel him in and he makes a beeline straight to you.

Eye contact is quite the seductive flirting tool, but don't underestimate its power. If you get too good at this and unintentionally shoot provocative looks around left, right and centre, you may unwittingly invite over every Tom, Dick and Harry!

Be Cheeky

If you are naturally cheeky or a little mischievous then use this to your advantage. Take the 'Glance and Look Down' a step further, and give him a playful wink and brazen smile. Who wouldn't be attracted to a beautiful woman playfully inviting him over?

Flirting Tips For Shy Girls

If you are so painfully shy you would rather stick ice picks in your eye than make eye contact, avoid all the hard work and let them come to you. Being shy doesn't have to mean you are invisible, so wear something that makes you look great and is going to get you noticed. Men's eyes are like heat seeking missiles searching for tight-fitting clothes and available skin. So tap in to his primeval being, flash a bit of flesh and watch him come to you.

Strike Up A Random Conversation

Be bold! You don't have to be the extroverted life of every party to strike up a random discussion. If someone catches your eye, try a cheeky side flirt by starting an innocent conversation about something you obviously both have in common. Like the drink you're drinking, or a sports team you're watching. Even if you decide that you actually prefer a friendly chat to a flirtatious one, meeting new people is fun, good for the soul and great practice for when you do want it to progress in to a bona fide flirt. Excellent flirting tips for girls!

Give Compliments

If he's come over to talk to you, or you're trying to think of something clever as an opening line, then throw in a shameless compliment. Who doesn't want to hear that they look good? Break the ice by commenting on something he's wearing, like 'Great Tie', or 'I love Your Watch'. Entice him with a smile and engage in some friendly banter. Chances are if you make him laugh and throw in some playful innuendo he's going to want to stick around to hear more.

Be Clear And Concise

Although it might be as clear as day to you that you're interested, sometimes men need plenty of concise simple messages to confirm they're in. Your guy may be just as shy and uncertain as you and questioning himself if you are really interested. Seal the deal by using open body language such as pointing your body towards him, or standing into his body to talk in his ear. Or up the ante by adding light body touching.

To Fast Track These Flirting Tips For Girls Check Out How To Be Irresistibly Attractive

Flirting Tips For Girls - Don'ts

If you're out for a night with a mission to meet someone, don't make it harder on yourself than you have to by burying yourself deep in the pack of your girlfriend's. If you have trouble just maintaining eye contact imagine how hard it is for some men to penetrate the protective layer surrounding you. Give yourself a chance by standing where you can be seen, mingling or innocently merge in with the group of guys standing next to you.

If you've flirted up a storm but upon turning your back for a few seconds only to find him chatting up another girl, move on. As insulting as it may be, it's really not worth worrying about. Find someone else who is worth your time.

Don't be too cool for school. Playing hard to get is one thing but you can miss out on some great experiences and fun by not letting go and having a laugh with someone just because they don't tick all of your usual boxes.

If someone doesn't' get your sense of humour, move on. Good looks can be important but your pairing however long it may last, will be incredibly dull if you're not on the same wave- length

These flirting tips for girls apply to any women in life. Have fun, be yourself and enjoy the flirting ride.

How to Protect Your Relationship As a Woman

The word relationship is something to stirs up the heart when it is mentioned. It is what anybody will want to discuss and listen to. It is a friendship that two people cherish a lot. As a woman who is in a relationship with a man, you have to safeguard it and give it the maximum protections, because you have all it takes to do so. If you really and truthfully love your man, then there are things you must do to ensure you make it be how you desire it. This article shows the very important things to be done. Please read on!

When a woman loves a man, it is a sign that she cares for him. Caring and loving him is shown through your expressions, affections and your attention. It must be a part of you. It becomes your lifestyle. You become loyal and true to him. For instance, display your affections towards him in the right way and right time. Don't make the mistake of making it a routine, but ensure it becomes a part of you. Show him selfless love.

It is necessary for a you as a woman to take you relationship very serious and show a genuine interest towards everything about it. When you put in your best interest, it gives you the best result. Make it part of your priority. Don`t neglect it and expect the man to be the one to show such concern. Don`t make the mistake of thinking that it doesn't really matter. Treasure your man. Value him so much. When you do so, you won't give any room for interference. As a woman you have the ability to organize things and put things the right order.

One thing that scares a man away from a woman is when she makes the relationship a do or die affair. Be very real and don't mount pressure on him to make sure things work out for you.

Learn to be soft minded and practical. Things tend to move normally and naturally when you are yourself. A man does not play or even joke with his ego and so, don't make him feel he is not worth the best from you. You can't manipulate him to get what you want. Give him the respect he deserves and show some appreciation when he does something for you. A man will always desire to gain that soft spot in a woman. Give him that and see him desire for more.

Knowing that relationships is a mechanical something that works with formulas and rules, then make him feel comfortable with you and take him as your closest friend. True friendship maintains a good and cordial relationship. Cherish him dearly and confined in him. This will give room for easy understanding of things around him. You don't have to be rigid in your treatments to him, but feel free to express your mind, thoughts, fears, joy, emotions and even your desires to him. You will create a good channel for communication.

Exclusive traits you have to do and take serious in your relationship is faithfulness and fidelity. Be sincere to him and with him. Make sure he trusts you. Don`t try to play smart because it will not pay you in a long while. Sow fidelity and reap happiness. When you are faithful to your man, your attention will be channeled towards him and this will make you put in your best to make it work. Know that you cannot serve two masters at the same time; one must surely suffer if you do so. Believe that god will crown your efforts with good success.I wish you a truest relationship as you do so.

How to Protect Your Relationship As a Man

Relationship is a friendship that is perfected in companionship. It is marked by mutual happiness, joy, feeling and love. When a man is in a relationship with a woman he wants, there is an obvious show of it. To make the best out of it, you as the man will have to but in a lot of things. You are the one to protect it because as a man you are gifted with all it takes. Know that you can enjoy your relationship and have it be what the way you want it. This article shows those things that make it easier to have it work well for you. Please read on!

When you are in a relationship with a woman you have to love her, care and admire her. Cherish her not just in words but in deeds. Pamper and per her. When you do so, you are building an edge around her. She won't think of any other person other than you. This is because she sees you as someone she can believe in and someone who meets her needs, so how can she start looking for elsewhere when is very ok with you. When you are doing this ensure you are not manipulating her or controlling her feeling towards you. Go beyond trying to please her, bring out the best in her through your actions towards her. Encourage her and she will be proud of you.

Put in your time and efforts. Create time in your schedule for her. Don't neglect her when setting your top priorities. This shows how much value you place on her and how you treasure her. Don't make the mistake of making it a routine, exceed that boundary and go beyond that. Make her a part of you. For instance, you can give her a call, send text messages, buy gifts for her especially those ones she likes and even advice her when necessary. She will treat you as her prince. She will first consult you she wants to do anything. Help her when it is needful and don't kill her spirit with you criticisms.

When you are relating with her don't make it a do or die thing. She will be afraid of you if she discovers that you are mounting pressure on her. She won't feel comfortable around you. Learn to properly communicate to her what your feelings for easy understanding. Don't be scared to express your thoughts and feelings to her. This assures her of the importance you attach to the relationship. Knowing that what easily drives a woman is what she hears, so say the right and truthful things to her. Don't fabricate things to make her feel she is loved. You will only be deceiving your own self. You will gain her trust if she recalls your previous dealings with her.

Make her your best friend. Many a times, a man finds it hard to confide in the woman he loves. But learn to develop a true friendship with her. This makes communication easier. Don't treat her as an inferior person to you. Express your fears, thoughts, doubts, feelings and even your plans to her. This makes her feel valued and important. You never can tell how good she is until you entrust things into her hands. As a friend laugh with her, play and joke with her. This makes her very free with you and her honesty with you will be easily seen. Whatever you can't handle as a human being put them into the able hands of God Almighty. Don't cease to pray for her and yourself. As long as you diligently carry out your duties and responsibilities as a man, leave the rest for God and see the wonderful things that will happen to you.

Ups and Downs of Relationships

Are you in a relationship and feel neglected and rejected? You are constantly arguing with your lover and it seems solving the issues is not easy until you have decided to let go, yet you still feel something for the other spouse. Don't worry this is normal in relationships.

Relationships that have worked for a considerable amount of time do not lack arguments and disagreements, most people who have been in relationships will tell you this is normal since people are usually different from each other and the needs vary.

For those men who have broken up with their lover, its important to consider how the past few days have been without her by your side, did you enjoy the time or it was full of void because she wasn't around, if you did not enjoy the time then its time to get the queen of your life back. This may not be easy but if you put the following aspects into consideration then your life might be easy.

First before taking any step, assess your self and see if there is anything that has changed since you met with each other, if some of the things have changed, this might be some f the reasons that she doesn't love you anymore and you need to do something about it.

Another thing when it has reached time for break up, don't behave as if you are scared of losing her, instead agree to have the timeout, this will ease things in the coming days, you wont have to face the problem of you pleading with her to return back to your arms.

After the timeout is over, you should emphasize more on the sweet time and memories that you have shared; this will make your work easier since she will feel that you are more important to her.

If she requests you to be her friend and not intimate as you had been before, then avoid this because it will only worsen things since you will be tortured especially of the intimate moments that you have ever shared together, this is not good for you.

Tell her the truth. That you cannot live without her, avoid beating around the bush and never accept friendship at the expense of the relationship you have had together.

How To Win Someone's Heart

Ever tried to penetrate the tough guy facade? Or been turned away by the 'I don't need you or anyone else' face? There is a secret to winning someone's heart. This article does not guarantee that you will it merely equips you with the best tools to do so.

It does not matter if the situation is a boy trying to win the heart of a girl, a parent trying to get through to his rebellious teenager, an employer trying to help a disgruntled employee, or a wife trying to break down emotional barriers in her husband, the answer to accomplishing this is the same: understanding.

No one can win another's heart without first understanding what it took to get that person to the place they are. When you can walk emotionally and even, to some degree, mentally in the footsteps of another person, your understanding of who they are, how they got where they are, and why they do what they do will increase dramatically. This allows you the chance to win someone's heart.

Understanding accomplishes the following:

IT REDUCES YOUR ANGER

When you know why someone did what they did, you are often less inclined to get angry. If you knew that the person that stole your wallet was a 12 year old kid that had not eaten a thing in two weeks, you would probably not get very angry. If you knew that the person that cut you off while driving was desperate to get his pregnant wife to the hospital, you probably would not get angry.

If you knew the circumstances that brought a person to do what they did, you might not get so upset. That does not excuse what they did; it just means that you will be in more control over yourself, giving yourself greater opportunity to win that person's heart.

IT BRINGS COMPASSION

There is a story in the Bible about Jesus in Luke 17. A widow woman had just lost her only child and was on the way to bury him. Jesus knew within Himself that she was all alone. Understanding her situation brought greater compassion. Jesus resurrected her son.

During my years of counseling as a Pastor, I have discovered that well over 80% of all child molesters were molested as a child themselves. The path they were set upon was one that was forced on them. It in no way excuses their deplorable, despicable behavior, but it does allow me to have more compassion towards them. This compassion allows me the ability and opportunity to help them. Enough, perhaps, to change them from their previous path.

IT PROVIDES OPPORTUNITY

When someone loses their spouse, the person who is able to help the most is usually someone who has also lost their spouse. When someone is abandoned or divorced, those that are most helpful are often those who have gone through what they have. Again, the key is understanding. To understand someone allows you the opportunity to help them and to reach them.

The more you try to understand someone, the more opportunity you will have to help them.

CONCLUSION

Instead of just passing judgment on a person, why do you not attempt to understand them better? Understanding is the key to winning someone's heart!

Simple Ways to Cope With the Pain

It happens to everyone. You invest a lot of time and emotion into a relationship with someone and for one reason or another it doesn't work out. The destruction of a personal relationship can be a very devastating feeling. The pain and emotions that come along with a broken relationship can hurt almost as bad as a physical pain to any part of the body. Luckily there are a number of activities and ways that you can work on mending a broken heart that will help lessen the pain that comes along with broken relationships.

Many women find help to recover from a break up through the support and love of various friends and family members. There is something about the comfort and love that surrounding ourselves with these types of people has that allows the heart to mend a little faster. These people help those dealing with a broken relationship realize that the world has not ended and there are people who still love and support you. It might seem simple but just doing small activities with others can help lessen the emotional pain that comes with a separation. If activities aren't helping, just having a friend or family member serve as a shoulder to cry on can help ease any pain that you might feel.

Another popular way to help aid in mending a broken heart is to allow yourself to work on you as an individual. This can include discovering new hobbies or picking up an activity that you haven't done in a while. Working on yourself as an individual can also include doing some self evaluation and helping you find out more about yourself. Many people have expressed that they have used the time while recovering from a bad break up to learn a lot about themselves as an individual. Self exploration and individual soul searching are all ways to help heal the pain associated with the end of a relationship, with the added benefit of mending that broken heart.

There is no exact science behind what to do when it comes to mending a broken heart. What works for one person might not work for another. There are hundreds of various ways of handling a broken relationship. If something isn't working for you, try another technique. With the hundreds of possibilities out there, there has to be something that can help you get through this painful, emotional time.

Dealing with relationship problems is just one of the difficulties many women face every day that can be overcome with a little effort as well as expert help, guidance and support. Delicate Woman is a website devoted to helping women who are struggling to move forward and achieve their full potential. In additions to providing advice and information Delicate Woman also provides unique affirmations for women that can be utilized to great effect on a daily basis